Heavenletters

As we have our favorite Heavenletter of the day or week or month, there seem to be comments that are written in a moment of grace, stating something vitally important in a beautifully simple and straightforward way. So this one by Gloria Gloria is my favorite comment now.

I woke up this morning with a sudden and striking realization that said, "It does not depend on anything you can do or are unable to do, my dear Jochen."

I feel that, once our longing to return home reaches a certain intensity, nothing depends on anything any more. The longing -- a soft one without desperate urgency -- does it all, though not necessarily according to my agenda. And surrender isn't something I do or something I effect through practice.

Yet, Crystal, I know the situation you ar describing from years and years of firsthand experience. These feelings really are understandable. If you can, take Glorias advice. Just try being a little softer on yourself. You don't have to be able to lift yourself up to heaven. Ask God to show you the way and you will simply grow towards it. Growth happens. You don't do it, you simply love the thought of it. Meditation will be joyous and free and unburdened then. If it isn't, don't do it. I, for one, don't believe in the teachings of spiritual discipline any more. The may have been appropriate at one time. But once we allow ourselves to be touched by God, once we start feeling that Oneness may be literally true ....... well, how do you practice Oneness and what do you practice in Oneness?

Lots of sympathy for you, Crystal. Tell us more if you feel like it.