Kerry to God:
Dear God, I am having such incredible experiences. My dreams are profound and the interpretations easy. This quickening I am feeling often feels out of control. My body trembles, and I see the color purple shooting out of little children when they capture my heart, and I see little purple colors dancing around other beings. Am I going mad?!
As I posed this question, I picked up an advanced spiritual book, opened it at random, as it says to do, and I read:
"Disillusionment with yourself must precede enlightenment."
Would You care to elaborate, dear God?
Gratitude and love, Kerry
God to Kerry:
Dear Kerry of My Heart, experiences such as colors and trembling are experiences like any other. Look at them and witness their passage, just as you might watch a train passing by.
If you enjoy the colors as they come, enjoy them, but know they are not a prerequisite to the advanced states of consciousness you so desire.
Gently bring back your attention to your desire to know Me.
It is not states of consciousness or certain experiences that you seek. It is I you seek, not the world's pronouncement or what a book says of higher consciousness.
As to your question if you are going mad, you already know the answer to that. You know you are not.
Keep your eye on Me and not on colors. Colors are fine, but you don't have to have them.
How related your two questions are!
And the answer is the same: There is nothing that has to precede enlightenment. And there is nothing that you must not have. Enlightenment is not what you do.
The book you were reading probably equates disillusionment with yourself as loss of ego. What is loss of ego but looking somewhere else?
One does not need to see auras or not see them in order to become enlightened. One does not have to have clear or prophetic dreams, or not have dreams, in order to be enlightened.
There are no prerequisites to enlightenment. There is no clear path to enlightenment. It is not: "Do these seven things, and you will be enlightened" or "Follow these ten commandments, and enlightenment will be yours." You can do those things and not become enlightened. Or you may not do those things and become enlightened.
Trying hard for enlightenment may have you looking for it outside of you.
The true heart knows only enlightenment. Enlightenment is your natural state. It is what I gave you.
Enlightenment is not a procedure.
It is not an accomplishment nor a victory.
It is a state. This state is guaranteed you. It is guaranteed to come.
Enlightenment is a by-product of knowing Me, with or without My Name.
I have heard it said that enlightenment is given you by My grace, and that is true. I have already given it to you.
Now it is by your grace that you accept it.
Enlightenment is no big deal.
Like many things, it's momentous, especially before you have it; you think everything will change when you do, just like you think that when you get that new shiny car, you will be happy forever.
Happiness will take care of itself.
Consider enlightenment as a gift you give.
Give enlightenment to others.
Help someone to smile.
Let enlightenment come to you, and it will.
You don't have to have it.
Be not attached to enlightenment. Be attached to Me.
Consider My Will your enlightenment.
Help Me carry light for the world. Even your intention to help Me goes a long way.
Do not demand too much of yourself.
Enlightenment is not fireworks constantly going off. It is not one amusement park ride after another. It is not drums and bangles and horns.
It is usually a quiet walk with Me in your heart. At these times, things like time and space are not so relevant to you anymore.
So, dear Kerry, have I answered your questions?
Seek Me, and not the trappings of Me.
Be innocent. Don't read too many books or listen to too many how-to's.
There is a book written in your heart.